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Posts Tagged ‘retro’

ironic tshirt

He spends his days searching thrift stores and his nights pouring over the internet looking for the perfect t-shirt.  He has very high standards for his shirts.  Regardless of their quality or condition, they at a minimum must be clever, if not ironic.  He likes his t-shirts to have a message and tell you something about himself.  Here are a few fun and informative facts about him as presented by his t-shirts:

– He was a member of the Whackin’ Wizards team that won the 1986 Buddy C. Clancey Junior High kickball tournament.

– He watches the Thundercats, Captain Planet, and He-Man.

– You’d better keep an eye on him because he supports the Cobras in their epic war against the Joes.

– Jesus is his homeboy.

– He supports his furry friends like the Rescue Rangers, Gizmo, or any of the creatures from Fraggle Rock or Sesame Street.

– His tuxedo t-shirt lets you know that he can be formal and knows when to dress up but relaxed enough to want to party.

– He is single handedly trying to bring back the 1970s retro sports team logos for the NBA, ABA, NFL, and MLB.

– Although he was only three years old, he wants to let you know he somehow got tickets to the 1990 California Raisins concert and worldwide tv event Raisins: Sold Out!  Additionally, he must have a time machine in his basement because he has “vintage” concert t-shirts for bands like the Clash and the Rolling Stones from their respective 1983 world tours.

– He does his civic duty by letting everyone he passes know that he believes “Crack is Whack” even though he was born after N.W.A. came Straight Outta Compton in 1988.

– If, perhaps, your weekend if free, his t-shirt advertises that he has two tickets to the gun show.  You’d better call soon because they look like they may go fast.  He also is offering moustache rides for 5¢.  At a price like that, how could you not take him up on his offer!

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